I have not really been looking forward to the holidays this year. I know they are going to be difficult. But, for once, I think the universe may be conspiring to help me in a most backhanded fashion. The universe has decided to keep me too busy and tired to think this holiday season. Which should make it simply fly by.
This week, my son developed a second round of ear infection. I've spent most of the last two days holding and consoling him. On Tuesday, while I was counting the minutes until our doctor's appointment, my husband received a call letting him know that he's got the new job he was shooting for. He has to report to the new station, on the other side of the country, by the end of January. Yes, this upcoming January. While this is good news, it also means we'll have Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's, packers, and a drive across our great nation in the middle of winter. All in the next 8 weeks.
That therapist I was referred to has been playin phone tag with me for a week or so now. She caught me yesterday and I explained my situation. I told her I wondered if it was worth starting with her if I'm leaving momentarily. She agreed it was frustrating to start with someone and then start all over again a few weeks later. We agreed that I can call her back if I need an ear before I go. I don't even have time for therapy. Seriously.
Two things that have made me sad this week:
-I was walking up to some local shops to do some Christmas shopping and realized again that I don't need a gift for Dad this year. He used to be so hard to buy for. I had finally figured out some sure-fire winners last year. And now he's gone. My Christmas gift list has shrunk.
-Today my son was talking about doing something back at my Mom's house. As though we were headed there for an event (he likes to make up stories now). He said to me, "You and me and Grandma and Papa... (pause) Papa's at Heaven. Grandma and Joseph and Miss Kathy and Mr. Richie will all go."
We are spending Thanksgiving with wonderful friends tomorrow. I made potatoes and pie and muffins to bring along. Dad loved apple pie. But he liked it cold. With ice cream. So I'll think of him when I eat mine tomorrow.
I have so many things for which to be thankful. My sadness hasn't erased those things. It has made them more precious. I am thankful for that this year.
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3 comments:
You could do a donation in your dad's name. That's an on going type of gift. Just a thought.
I can't even imagine you guys doing all the packing and traveling in the midst of winter.
My word verification is almost like 'commotion' but it's comoniat.
I was also thinking of a way for you to still give your dad a gift. Brenda has a great idea.
We packed out in a month and a half. I highly recommend it. There is no time to stress over details. This thought kept running through my mind...if it gets packed accidentally I'll buy a new one. The child made due with one pair of shoes because he thought it'd be funny to hide his sandals. They got packed inside a cooking pan. Seriously, we found a great house in a great neighborhood with great schools nearby in a few days. It will all work out. Enjoy the holidays.
I think what Brenda wrote about the donation in your dad's name is a great idea. In fact, I am going to do the same thing for Cindy for Christmas.
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